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2024 Author: Malcolm Clapton | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 03:44
No one is immune from failures. To learn how to cope with the bitterness of defeat and move on, you need to understand how our brains work in such unpleasant circumstances.
Friedrich Nietzsche argued that what does not kill us makes us stronger. There is some truth in this: the failures that we have to go through make us wiser and more tolerant of other people's mistakes. But it is also true that trouble does not come alone, and one failure, as a rule, is followed by several more. It turns out that black stripes have a biological explanation.
Why are we unlucky
Every time we win, our brain reacts to it by releasing testosterone and dopamine. Over time, this signal begins to affect the functioning of the brain. In animals, more successful individuals, as a rule, become smarter, more enduring, more confident, therefore, they are more predisposed to success in the future. Biologists call this the winner effect, and it works the same way in humans.
Although the term “loser effect” does not exist in science, in fact it manifests itself in a similar way. In contrast to Nietzsche's aphorism, the following is also true: what does not kill us makes us weaker. During one study. it was noticed that monkeys who failed to do something from the first attempts, and then mastered the necessary skill, still showed worse results than those who immediately succeeded.
Other studies. have shown that failures can weaken concentration and harm future performance. Thus, students who were taught that the results of their work were worse than those of others did indeed demonstrate poor assimilation of the material.
Finally, when we fail once, when we try again to achieve the same goal, the chances are high that we will fail again. During one experiment. a group of dieters were fed pizza, after which it was announced that they had exceeded their daily calorie intake. Immediately thereafter, participants in the experiment ate 50% more cookies than those who did not diet at all.
When we make a mistake, we often do something wrong right there and then reinforce our failures. This explains why one miss is usually followed by a succession of others.
How to break the chain of failure
The next time something doesn't go according to plan, try to refrain from taking the next steps that keep you from moving on.
1. Don't focus on failure
We've always been told that we learn from mistakes, so we overthink them. However, some research suggests that anxiety, anxiety, and anxiety about failure are the main causes of impaired performance.
Failure obsession gets in the way of effective problem solving. When you repeatedly pass unsuccessful attempts to achieve a goal through yourself and regard them as personal tragedies, self-doubt develops, stress increases, involuntary reactive neural connections are fixed in the brain. As a result, it becomes more difficult for the brain to cope with tasks and control the emotional state each time.
Reframe your failures in a different way.
Researchers believe that you can edit your past failures by imagining how they decrease and disappear. You can also dilute unpleasant memories with funny and implausible details.
Once you've learned the lesson from failure, stop thinking about it. Try to stay optimistic, because a positive attitude contributes to success in all areas of life.
2. Don't grab onto the first thing that comes along
When something doesn't work out for us, it's tempting to give up and say: "I didn't really want to!" We immediately switch to another target. But the point is, successful people tend to have a plan for failure. This does not mean that they are planning to lose. This means that they carefully consider the results of their achievements. When we don't have a plan, we tend to take the path of least resistance and easy victories that only move us away from what we really want.
Better to set clear long-term goals for yourself.
Proven. that in 90% of cases clearly formulated ambitious goals lead to higher results than undefined ones. Also installed. that even answering simple "where" and "when" questions increases the likelihood of completing the task.
A contingency plan in case of failure helps you stay on track when things get tough.
3. Don't bully yourself
Someone who has failed will not want to experience it again, especially in the same field of activity. Because of this, we sometimes subconsciously give ourselves instructions like "do everything right, otherwise it will turn out like last time." Psychologists call this a failure avoidance motivation. However, studies show that this type of motivation increases the anxiety caused by the fear of possible failure. As a result, performance decreases.
Set positive goals and celebrate even small wins.
When you set out to achieve something, remember that clear positive goals motivate better than vague and intimidating ones. Celebrate even the smallest accomplishments. This prolongs the joy of victory and increases motivation. When we feel close to success, our brains start to work better. In one study, this phenomenon was called the target's magnifying glass effect.: The closer we are to the goal, the higher our motivation and productivity.
By measuring and marking our progress towards what we want, we multiply the positive effect of our achievements.
Of course, failure is inevitable. But how you deal with them and move on will determine whether you become a chronic loser or someone who is somehow unlucky.
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