How to deal with a bad mood in any situation

2024 Author: Malcolm Clapton | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 03:44

Psychologists told how to analyze the internal state in order to change it for the better.

This has happened to each of us at least once: it would seem that everything is fine, life is going according to plan, but then the mood suddenly deteriorates. And it is completely unclear why this is happening.

Several factors are responsible for a good mood at once: our thoughts, psychological state, life situation, environment and people nearby. Changing one or more of these components can lead to emotional changes.

Psychologists analyzed seven common scenarios for a bad mood and told how to deal with it.

1. A friend complains about life, and you start to feel sad too

This is where emotional contamination comes in - a simple, even primitive, psychological phenomenon. Professor of psychology at the University of Hawaii Elaine Hatfield explains that during a conversation, people naturally repeat facial expressions, posture, and the rate of speech of the interlocutor.

The movements of the muscles involved in this process (for example, when you frown) activate neural connections, and they give rise to the same feelings in you that the interlocutor is talking about. This feature of the brain is designed to help us empathize with others, thereby strengthening social bonds.

How to cheer yourself up

Take a break from your conversation, say go to the bathroom. Remind yourself that the bad mood you’re in this moment is not yours, but your friend’s. And the best thing you can do is listen to your loved one, not solve their problems.

2. You ponder a difficult situation for a long time, but still do not find a solution

At first glance, it seems like a very sensible approach to think carefully about important life issues. But sometimes from a search for a solution to a problem, this process turns into marking time in one place.

Sonya Lubomirski PhD in Psychology, author of the book “The Psychology of Happiness. A new approach”.

It's hard to resist endless repetitive reflections on life, because you feel like you are studying yourself deeply in the process. In fact, this is not the case. You just spin the wheels on a kind of psychological bike, but you just can't get anywhere. This worsens your already poor condition and diminishes your motivation.

Two signs indicate that you are marking time and not looking for a way to solve a problem. These are unpleasant emotions, such as anxiety or anger, and the inability to switch to other ideas due to the constant return to the same thought.

How to cheer yourself up

Get distracted. Read a book, watch a movie with an exciting plot, listen to music, take a walk in the fresh air.

Take 15-20 minutes and write down your thoughts on paper or talk about the problem with a friend, and then make a plan for the solution. This will move you from thinking to acting. “Perhaps you will understand that your life situation is far from being as hopeless as you thought,” emphasizes Sonya Lubomirsky.

3. You are constantly under stress

Sometimes stress is a side emotion, a kind of reaction to other feelings. Imagine that the deadline for an important project at work is suddenly moved or you are set up by a loved one. In both cases, you will experience stress, but it will only be a secondary emotion. In the first version, the main feeling will be irritation or despair, in the second - resentment.

Susan David Ph. D., author of Emotional Flexibility. How to learn to enjoy change and enjoy work and life."

Emotions are an important source of information about your life and what excites you. The correct definition of emotions helps to understand what is really going on inside you and why you are experiencing certain feelings.

How to cheer yourself up

Ask yourself what other emotion your psychological state is like. Identify the initial feeling that the stress is hiding, and try to understand why you have this feeling.

People often experience strong emotions when someone hurts their dignity. You may be stressed because you feel that you are not appreciated at work or at home. When you find the root of the problem, you’ll find the solution.

Susan David points out that even if nothing can be done about the situation, correctly identifying the primary feeling will help relieve stress.

4. You feel guilty about being happier

Meta-emotions, that is, feelings that arise from other emotions, are a fairly common psychological phenomenon. If you were sad because you felt anxious, or embarrassed because you wanted to cry, you experienced meta-emotions.

Christine Neff Professor of Educational Psychology at the University of Texas, author of Self-Compassion. About the power of compassion and kindness to oneself."

People perceive emotions as part of their personality. The brain works this way for a number of reasons. As a child, boys and girls are often told that perfectly normal human emotions, such as anger, are bad. Because of this, the child begins to believe that when he is angry, he himself becomes "bad." In fact, emotions come and go. And they have nothing to do with your personality and character.

How to cheer yourself up

In order to learn to understand your feelings, and not judge yourself for them, you need to seriously work on yourself.

Christine Neff

Let go of the illusion that you always have to control your feelings. Think about what you would say to your friend if he came to you with the same primary emotion. Most likely, you would respect his feelings, show that you care about his suffering, and also calm and support him.

Being reminded that feeling what you are feeling is completely natural will help you to stop worrying about the fact that you feel bad.

5. You constantly replay the most terrible scenarios in your head

When your brain imagines the worst that could happen, it tries to prepare you for it. However, this approach only increases anxiety, so changing your thinking is important and necessary.

Of course, you shouldn't look at the world through rose-colored glasses and ignore the problems. It is enough to objectively perceive what is happening and see the immediate future.

How to cheer yourself up

When bad thoughts take over, ask yourself two simple questions:

1. Is there any evidence that this could actually happen?
2. How to look at the situation in a neutral or even winning light?

This approach is called cognitive restructuring and has the potential to positively influence mood.

Then try to find a solution to the problem and look at it more broadly - this will help you return to the active position again.

6. You get sad from time to time

Changes in air temperature outside the window and early sunset in autumn and winter can negatively affect the psychological state and even change sleep patterns and eating habits. This happens because the body does not have time to adapt to new conditions. Scientists have found that sunlight also affects the areas of the human brain that are responsible for mood.

How to cheer yourself up

Try to walk outdoors more often on clear days. In winter, you can try using a special "lamp of joy", which makes up for the lack of sunlight for the body and helps to cope with seasonal depression. The brightness of such lamps ranges from 2,500 to 10,000 lux, while the brightness of a conventional light bulb is up to 500 lux.

7. You are angry and annoyed for no apparent reason

You are probably familiar with this situation: the day is going well, but suddenly some trifle turns the mood upside down. If this happens often in your life, you need to understand what is the real trigger for these changes.

Perhaps it's physical health. American scientists have found a link between the amount of sugar in the blood and emotional state. The researchers noted that sharp fluctuations in glucose levels are often accompanied by poor quality of life and poor mood.

Don't forget about your personal triggers: people, places, or other factors.

How to cheer yourself up

Determine what exactly affects your condition: psychological problems, the environment, or physical illness.

Susan David

Stop and notice the patterns in the chart that your mood changes. Perhaps your inner state often deteriorates due to the regular encounter with certain life difficulties.

Remember the emotions you feel, as well as changes in mood after interacting with the same people or visiting the same places. When you understand what exactly affects your psychological state negatively, you can begin to deal with the problem: drink less coffee, quit your unloved job, or build clear personal boundaries in communicating with people.

“Don't ignore or push away your emotional outbursts,” says Susan David. "Be curious, study them - it will help you stabilize your emotions and feel much better."